Alex's Birth Story

So Alex was born super early Sunday morning and we came home on Monday! Jason, Ashton, Alex and I rolled in just in time for lunch and Ashton's nap and things felt almost like they had any other day - minus our new little addition! We have been doing great the past couple of days, Ashton definitely has some adjusting to do and has been giving me a run for my money, but I'm reminding myself that bringing Alex home was no small change, for any of us.

Speaking of bringing Alex home, I thought I'd share the story of how he came into this world. I apologize in advance, there is just no way to make this sound good. So here we go.

Saturday, March 15th - full moon. Around 6 pm I just felt...different. I was three days past my due date at this point and knew things could start at any time, and had a feeling something was stirring. But I managed to eat dinner, Jason and I had our umpteenth conversation about what we would name the baby if it were a boy, and I went to bed.

Sunday, March 16th, 1:45 am - A very intense contraction woke me up. Not long after, another followed. I quickly started to time them and thought to myself, did these seriously start at 2 minutes apart?? Like, not 20, not 15...TWO. And they were getting stronger.

2:05 am - I wake up Jason and tell him, ummm, this is happening. I think. 

2:10 am - Jason calls Berg and Karen. We had told them a few hours earlier to keep their phone volumes up- they were our on-call friends to come over, sleep and be here in the morning when Ashton woke up. They said they were on their way and I changed, started to get ready to go, etc. The contractions were so strong a few of them doubled me over.

2:40 am - Berg and Karen arrive and we are out the door to the hospital. I had told them we were coming. The entire car ride, my contractions are still 2 minutes apart, lasting about a minute each, and it's like an onslaught of the most intense pain that I do not ever get a break from. Little did I know, I never would. When I could get a breath out during them, I think I basically just kept swearing. 

2:50 am - we arrive at Newton-Wellesley Emergency Room. We do check in and the nurse walks us up to maternity. I have to stop several times due to the contractions, which basically make your whole body tighten up, it's like someone is wrenching your insides into a clamp and you just want to explode. They, uh, really hurt.

3:00 am - I'm in the antenatal room, my contractions are even quicker and it's to the point where my breaks from the pain are less than 45 seconds. I am 5 cm, in active labor, and things are progressing so fast that they are unsuccessful in getting an IV in. I think I freaked the poor girl out. Another nurse starts to try and basically says, "Screw it, there's no time for this, we need to get you to labor and delivery" and wheel me out down the hall. Now mind you, this whole time I'm like swearing and moaning and just kept asking where my epidural was. Things were getting ugly.

3:15 am - I am in the delivery room, basically screaming. There are a thousand people all around me, running to and fro, setting up, calling the doctor, and at one point I realize, through the fog, that I will not be getting an epidural. I keep asking for one, how come it's not here yet, and no one really answers. I was one of those poor souls for which it was "too late". The pain gets worse.

3:16 am - Pain and suffering.

3:18 am - Pain and suffering.

3:20 am - I'm still screaming and writhing on the table and this feels like it is going on for an eternity. I vaguely recall yelling things like, "Do something! Please!" and "I can't do this! I can't! I can't!" "Tell me what to do! I can't breathe!" I am freaking out to such an extent that one of the nurses, in the nicest way possible, tells me to get ahold of myself. Looking back, I was just so unprepared to handle the pain, I didn't know how to breathe properly or relax my body because a natural birth was never in my plan. It was like an exorcism, I swear. I start to get sick because of the pain. The force of getting sick causes my water to break. Probably the grossest feeling imaginable. Ever seen an elephant pee at the zoo? Like that much warm fluid, gushing everywhere.

3:22 am - I feel the uncontrollable urge to push - most everyone is set up (this is not a calm environment!) and the doctor is ready.

3:24 am - I'm still a disaster. To their credit, the entire time, the nurses have been really encouraging, "You can do this", "you're doing great", etc etc. The doctor tells me to be calm and that I'm going to have this baby on the next push. Honestly, those words save me. I had no idea it was almost over as I could not focus on anything. 

3:26 am - I push again, we run into a serious snag. The cord is wrapped around the baby's neck, so I actually have to try and be still/stop pushing while she clamps and cuts it free. That was a scary moment and one I remember vividly as everyone spoke deliberately and hurriedly in such an intense environment.

3:29 am - one final push and the baby is born. They tell me to look down and I finally open my eyes. The first thing I see as it comes out is a scrotum. I think I said, "Oh, it's a boy" in a daze.

Due to the cord and the speed and sheer force under which he comes out, he has trouble breathing in the beginning and needs oxygen. But I eventually hear him cry and his second Apgar score is a 9. We have another son.

I honestly can't believe how fast it all happened, and how much it hurt. I feel a little embarrassed at how I handled the whole thing but in the moment, I was basically about to float outside my body and never come back. It was really traumatizing :( Alex was totally worth it, but wow. A nurse told me the next day that if I ever had another (the idea of which renders me speechless), they would never let me wait to go into labor naturally - I'd be induced well in advance of my due date. I guess I'm the kind that gives birth by the side of the road after not making it to the hospital on time. 

Writing this all out still makes me shake my head and go "what happened??" Soooo different than labor and delivery with Ashton, which was much less violent haha. The whole thing was less than two hours but a hundred times more intense. I never imagined I'd have to give birth without drugs and it's something I would never want to do again.

Anyway, here I am four days later and obviously still physically recovering. Will be for awhile. Alex is the sweetest of the sweet and I will try and post some more pictures in the next couple days. Thanks for sharing this incredible journey to two kids with me :) xox