It's utterly ridiculous. This is the true story of last night.
4:45 pm - Arrive home from work and search for Ashton. He likes to hide when he hears my car so of course I pretend to seek. Then I change my clothes, Jen leaves and I get down on the floor and play with the boys.
5:30 pm - Preheat the oven, get out sippy, bib, milk, water, fork, cups etc. All the accoutrements for both kids.
5:45 pm - I am not going to win any awards with dinner last night - chicken nuggets and sweet potato fries. Wonder if Alex wants to try some fish tonight - put fish sticks in as well.
6:00 pm - Wash everyone's hands, drop Alex in highchair, cut up a bunch of fruit, cheese and whatever else I can find in the fridge that is baby-friendly. Arrange Ashton's food *JUST SO*, it must be organized and all lined up if I expect him to eat it. He sits at the island and wants crackers. Of course, the answer is no and things get messy. While Alex eats and Ashton cries, I wash all my lunch containers, coffee mug, pump and bottle stuff from the day and generally try to clean up.
6:20 pm - Alex is still eating (and loves the fish!), Ashton is done after three micro-bites and brings his cars into the kitchen. He plays with them very loudly.
6:30 pm - Alex finishes, I wipe everything up, clean the highchair, and go upstairs to start the tub while the boys roll around in the living room
6:40 pm - I have to bribe Ashton to take a bath with new toys: a wind up turtle and shark that "swim". He bounds upstairs and into the bathroom while I take Alex to his room to strip him down. He has a huge poop that I did not expect. Fabulous! He's very squirmy so in the process of wiping him clean, it gets everywhere. I drop him naked into his crib to put a new changing pad cover on. I think, I should probably do laundry tonight and scoop it all up plus what is in Ashton's room. At this point, I see in the bathroom that Ashton is still fully clothed and his shirt and sleeves are soaked from leaning over into the water so he can play with his new toys. I strip him and drop him in the water. Go back to get Alex, realize he has peed all over his crib. Still naked and crying, he's wedged under my arm while I change his mattress pad and sheet. Add to laundry. Then he goes into the tub too.
6:50 pm - Ten minutes of splashing and trying to soap up both boys. It's what I call Double Bath Night, and I usually like to wait for a night when Jason is home to help but they were getting smelly.
7:00 pm - Hair is washed and butts and beans are clean. Alex is plucked first and I hit drain on the water. Ashton stays in while Alex gets toweled off and into his pajamas.
7:05 pm - Alex goes into his crib to play, I go back for the second kid and see he has dumped ALL the soap into the water and splashed it enough so there are bubbles everywhere. There was at least half a bottle left. A mess to wipe up later.
7:10 pm - Ashton gets all his lotions and into his pajamas, I change his sheets too (I like to put clean boys into clean beds) and I run him downstairs and put a quick show. Go back up, zip Alex into his sleepsack and nurse him, all the while listening to Ashton crash around downstairs. He is definitely not watching the TV. What is he doing? Feel very torn about cutting the baby off early to go see.
7:20 pm - Alex is asleep and I find that Ashton is still in one piece with no noticeable damage anywhere. Phew. We pick up all the toys, choose some stories and sit on the couch and read.
7:35 pm - Jason texts me he is on his way home. 10 minutes later, he walks in the door and Ashton jumps up and down because it's time to do superhero, which is when Jason wraps him in a towel and swings him all around his room.
7:55 pm - Little preschool teeth are brushed and lights out. I sit in the chair next to his bed in the half-dark while he chatters on about juggling- something he is obsessed with lately. No one has any idea why. Specifically juggling apples where people take bites out during the process, it's so odd. He sits up and makes the hand motions, alternating sides up and down ("and when you juggle your hands go like this, like this, like this, like this, like this") and talks about how maybe Daddy can juggle in the morning, when his light turns green. I give him a big squeeeeeeeeeze hug and kiss him, close his door, and exhale. Rinse all the bubbles out of the tub and put toys into basket. Time to start the laundry...
So there it is. 5:30 - 8 pm, a night in the life. I wrote all this out thinking it would be a good exercise and maybe I could identify potential areas of inefficiency. But it really does take 2.5 hours. Perhaps on the nights Jason is home after 8 pm it is a tad shorter - no superhero, no extra hype that Daddy is home. But it's a lot to manage, two at one time at the end of a day. Unfortunately it's not the kind of juggling that Ashton appreciates ;)
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