Due Date

Dear Baby Nill #2,

Today is your due date. I have to admit, I did not expect to see March 12 and still be pregnant. I guess that's what I get for interpreting the information my OB and the nurses gave me as "you'll be early!". I should know better than that. And then after last Thursday's false alarm...well, you've been setting expectations since 36-37 weeks and I just didn't know what was going to happen. Clearly, nothing before today at least. We rode a big wave of hype last weekend and then, you stayed in.

So now I am on the list to be induced tomorrow. They could always call me today at some point to bump me, but if they tell me to show up at 8:30 am ready to go, will I do it? I was up all night last night debating. Your dad has some big work commitments coming up and I'm not going to lie, it would be easier if you were here by this weekend. An induction would also make it easier to plan for Ashton and family visits and just about everything really. But I keep going back to the fact that you are still due just today, and although it would be nice to meet you and say goodbye to pregnancy discomfort, is this about me and what I want? Not really. Can I have my first act as your mom be to force you out? I'm not a landlord with a tenant who is behind on their rent! You are perfectly entitled to take another week (at which point, though, I would be much more willing to induce) and you are certainly not the first baby in history to keep people waiting. We'll survive. But oh, the convenience of knowing you could be here tomorrow...

Every morning I wake up and think, Ok, if today is the day, this is how the schedule with Ashton and the visits and family coordination will play out. And every morning, there's a solution. The difference between the past 10 days and the future 10 days lies, as I mentioned, with your dad's schedule. He wants to be there as much as possible for me and for you and it's going to get more complicated as the days tick on and you aren't here.

And so, I still don't know what to do. Can you please just come out on your own? And I can be one of those moms that says, "I was scheduled to be induced and then went into labor the night before!". Your room is all ready, your clothes are washed, your carseat is set, and we are pretty sure what we will name you. You hang out with your brother all the time:

And we already love you to bits, no matter when you decide to come. But perhaps you could think about starting the trip :)

xoxox
Mom

March 12, 2014 - 40 weeks